Farts on a Plane

well, Denzel Washington may have made Snakes on a Plane a scary movie but a real-life tooter made an American Airlines flight rather stinky yesterday. And, in a foiled attempt to mask the odor of her farts, lit a match to camouflage the smell.

Now it doesnt take a frequent flyer to know that lighting matches on a plane is a no-no. Farting on a plane, however, has not yet been outlawed and is something we all have to fly with everyday. If you have to fart, do you hold it in or let it out. Like when Elaine was sitting in the middle seat on that episode of Seinfeld and she reallly had to pee. she had to way the pros and cons of waking the guy up next to her versus possibly peeing all over the seat.

This all brings up a good question...If someone is farting freely and frequently next to you, what is proper anti-fart etiquette? Do you ring for the flight attendant or push the button to release the oxygen mask above you?

While that gets debated lets address a more important issue - what the fuck are matches doing on an airplane? They should join the ranks "no liquids" aboard, as well as no snakes, scorpions and people with really bad B.O.


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